Hindsight is a strange thing. I have a tendency to feel anxious about upcoming events in our life, and imagine every possible scenario. But then, a week, or even a day after said big event it’s so easy to forget that anxiety and be all like “well duh it worked out”.
You probably think I’m talking about having a baby…and while that is giving me plenty to imagine and have anxiety about, lately other things have been on my mind as well. Growing up, worrying about my dad having a job wasn’t really something I thought about. My dad is a doctor, and those are pretty much needed anytime, anywhere. While I know my parents had their share of decision-making and uncertainty in their lives, they always knew at the very least what my dad’s job title, so to speak, would be.
Even with my own degree, there is pretty much one path you can take. Of course that is changing with technology and such, but still, most education majors become teachers. Then I met Tanner. A business major. I too was a business major for a year and a half…until I realized I had no idea what I wanted to do with it and that I would eventually graduate and go on to either work for a big company and work my way up, or have to create a job for myself. I realize there are actually more than two options, but in my 19 year old mind, those were my options and I didn’t like either, so I changed majors.
Deciding to marry Tanner was such an obvious YES for me, that I didn’t really think too much about his future career. His dad has been a successful business man with no schooling, and Tanner is smart and a hard worker. I figured it would all work out. Well flash forward two years later and we’re one semester away from him being finished with school- which brings up all sorts of feelings. Mostly ones of holy-crap-we’re-going-to-be-real-grown-ups. And unlike my dad or myself…Tanner doesn’t have a prescribed job title that comes with his diploma.
Which is probably why, other than talking about babies, the number one thing Tanner and I talk about lately is his business ideas. I think they are wonderful and amazing and I know he’ll succeed at what he puts his mind to. Also, I realize we’re about to enter a terrifying stage in our life with no guaranteed income and starting our own company. How’s that for grown-up?
I guess I’m writing all this, because I like to think of this blog as a little journal for our family. That we’ll look back and think ‘ah I forgot about that!’. My parents often talk about the years my dad was in med school as the hardest, and best, of their marriage. They had 3 small children, were living off of student loans, living far from family, and my dad was trying to make the most important decisions of his career. Yet somehow, they made lots of happy memories and now talk about that time with fondness.
These past two years of Tanner being a student has had it’s advantages and disadvantages- one advantage school gives you is the security of having a plan. You live according to semesters and just take life one class at a time. Then you graduate and have to face real life. I went through it the year after I graduated- and now we’ll go through it again as a family. My hope is one day we’ll be sitting around in our family room surrounded by our kids talking about how scary and exciting it was to start our own company and step into the unknown- but that it all worked out in the end. That’s the dream we’ll be holding onto for the next 5…10..15 years? Only time will tell. But we’ll have this little blog post to look at and (hopefully) laugh at how anxious we were about all the future had in store for us…only to realize there were good things waiting for us.
So all that rambling does have a point. About a week and a half ago, Tanner entered a business plan competition. He had to give a 30 minute presentation on his business plan in front of a panel of judges, and then was asked questions by the judges and other professors in attendance. Tanner worked so hard on his plan, excited to have a reason to put all his plans to paper and see if they could actually work. The night before he was scared…because what if the judges poked holes in his plan and our whole plan for the future was ruined; but he was also excited because when he crunched the numbers it really looks like his plan might work!
Anyways, long story short, ( in which I cut out all the gushing about how amazing he was/ how proud I am of him) he won the competition! The judges gave him great feedback and advice, and for 24 hours we lived on this high that our future plans have some validity! Then we were back to feeling anxious and worried…but with a little more hope haha.
So if our kids are reading this one day, go give your dad a big hug for doing scary things in order to provide for us. You’re amazing Tanner, and I’m sure proud of you and excited for our future adventures!